为什么人人都需要一个谢尔顿那样的好朋友？

因为他机智？嘴贱？二？

或者是兼而有之？

下面的理由可能是最官方而全面的了，因为给出这20条理由的是CBS（Columbia Broadcasting System 哥伦比亚广播公司，对，就是首播生活大爆炸的那家公司）。

1. He makes you feel better when you’re upset.

If you're down in the dumps, Sheldon is just the man to cheer you up.

要是你抑郁了，谢尔顿就是那个让你振奋起来的人啊！

Sure, he might not tell you exactly whatyou want to hear, but he always speaks the truth and isn't afraid to have those#realtalk conversations that make other people uncomfortable. Like, when hetold Penny that crying should only be reserved for times people are sad, notwhen they feel stupid.

是的，可能你想听的他都没说，但是他会讲真话啊，就是那些让人不舒服的真话。

比如Penny哭的时候，他告诉她：“人们哭是为了缓释难过，因为自己傻而哭就说不过去了。”

知道真相的我竟然眼泪掉不下来了……

2.His personal drama is incrediblyentertaining.

Who else can say they have a frenemy named Wil Wheaton? Now, we don't know Wil personally, but we're guessing he doesn't have that many arch nemeses like Sheldon. While it's always great when everyone gets along like peas and carrots, there's something about this particular feud that makes us smile. 

谢尔顿有一个叫威尔的“友敌”，我们不了解威尔的生活，但是能以这种方式跟他相处的人应该不多吧。谁不期待生活中有个朋友跟自己相爱相杀啊！——毕竟普通意义上的好朋友有些单调啊。

就像马龙和张继科一样，相爱相杀……

3.He defends his friends against onlinetrolls.

Are you being harassed by some anonymous online commenter? Let Sheldon handle it for you!

你因为网上的匿名评论而苦恼？让谢耳朵来替你干掉他们！

After all, no one wants to battle with a guy who says,"You mess with thebull, you get the horns. I'm about to show this guy how horny I canbe!" 

毕竟，没人愿意和说了这话的人吵架—— “你丫惹恼了一头公牛，我会拿角对着你。我倒要让你看看我有多硬！”

嗯，horn 这个词好像怪怪的呢……

4. He's mastered the art of organization.

Cleanliness is next to godliness, right? Well, for Sheldon, not only is cleaning a lifestyle, it's an ideology. The man believes that everything has its place, and he expects his friends to respect his scrupulous scrubbing methods. 

对谢耳朵来说，干净整洁不是生活态度，而是一种意识形态——万物都该有自己的位置，并且应该被安置在那儿。他希望所有的东西都能干净整洁地被安置在自己的位置上。

The good news is, if you don't have the time (or desire) to clean, Sheldon's happy to sneak into your apartment in the middle of the night and organize for you!

如果你没时间或者就是单纯地不愿意整理东西，谢耳朵可是很高兴能替你做这些事呢——午夜潜入你家里，偷偷帮你打点好一切。

收拾可以，午夜潜入就不要了吧……

5. He’s always down for some real talk.

As we mentioned earlier, Sheldon's never been one to sugarcoat.

我们前面说过了，谢耳朵说话可是从来不嘴甜不委婉。

Want to know if your outfit looks good? He’ll be more than happy to give you his unfiltered opinion, so prepare accordingly.

想知道自己衣服穿得好不好看？他可是乐意至极告诉你真实的答案——提前做好心理准备。

找你就是奔着实话去的，毕竟不是谁都有勇气认真地说出“你穿这衣服不好看”……

6. He manages to make arguments entertaining.

Friendshipsaren’t perfect and, even for the closest of confidantes, you’re bound to have afew disagreements. Thankfully, most arguments with Sheldon induce more laughsthan rage—especially when he tries to one-up you with comebacks like, "I'mpolymerized tree sap, and you're an inorganic adhesive."
Friends who fight and laugh together, stay together, right?

即使最亲密的朋友也难免有争吵。

但是如果你有一个谢耳朵这样的朋友，那你们的争吵往往变得欢乐比愤怒多——特别是当他试着用讲道理的方式说服你的时候，对吧？

朋友不就是这样嘛——吵吵闹闹却彼此离不开。

是啊，争吵之后不记仇才是友情的可贵之处呢……

7. He’s a strong believer in putting safety first.

When you hang around with Sheldon, there's no need to fear for your own safetybecause the man's list of protection rules is longer than a CVS receipt. Casein point: when playing with life-sized building blocks, always wear a hardhat. 

当你和谢尔顿一起玩儿的时候，没必要担心自己的人身安全，因为这家伙的安全措施清单比做个软件的代码还要长。

还记得玩儿真人大小积木的时候，他戴上安全帽吗？

太惜命，鉴定完毕。

8.He knows exactly what to do when someone gets the sniffles.

Gettingsick as an adult can be the worst. Luckily, Sheldon has inspired an entirelist of ways to handle cold and flu season that are sure to help you feel betterin no time

生病对于成年人来说真是太糟糕了。幸运的是，谢尔顿有一清单的方式让你从感冒发烧中感觉好一点（他妈妈告诉他的），这肯定能让你感觉好一点儿。

“我妈说别人不好受的时候要端一杯热饮给他”在脑海里挥之不去……

9. He’s brimming with the greatest relationship advice.

Relationshiptroubles got you down? Take a seat on Dr. Sheldon's couch—just not in hisspot!—and let him help you sort out your romantic woes. He might have thegreatest track record when it comes to navigating his own relationship withAmy, but he's way cheaper than a licensed therapist. 

恋爱问题困扰着你？

请去咨询情感专家谢尔顿，坐在他的沙发上（注意不要坐他的专座），让他帮你走出困境——毕竟在与艾米的争吵中，他总结出了不少浪漫的处理恋爱问题的方式。而且，他比专业的情感顾问便宜啊。

谢耳朵也是老司机了……

10. His innocence is endearing.

Sometimes,even Mr. Know-It-All can learn a few things from the people around him. Afterall, you don't know what you don't know. 
有时候，无所不知先生也能从身边的人身上学到些东西呢。

For example, remember the time his pals informed him that "friends withbenefits" didn't meanproviding someone with health insurance? Adorable.

还记得他朋友跟他说“令人受益的朋友”指的并不是“提供健康保险的人”吗？

所谓“三人行必有我师焉”……

11. He leaves little room for surprises.

Thanks to Sheldon's frequent use of formal contracts and written agreements, youalways know where you stand—and how long you're allowed to stand there.
感谢谢尔顿事无巨细都要写合同的习惯吧，这样你就总是知道你站在哪儿，并且能在那儿站多久了。

That said, make sure to read the fine print before he asks for your JohnHancock, because what yousign seeis what you get.

这意味着，跟他签每份合同之前，你都要仔细阅读，因为你的亲笔签名意味着，你在合同上签（kan jian ）什么，你就得到什么——只要他写了合同，你同意不同意，都得签……

强攻型朋友哎……

12. His jokes are topnotch.

Did wemention Sheldon's a comedian, too? The man has a joke for every occasion and heknows when to whip 'em out.

Word to the wise: prepare for a possible spit-take if you happen to be tossingback a cold one when he busts out a one-liner like this: "A neutronwalks into a bar and asks how much for a drink. The bartender replies, 'Foryou, no charge.'" 

Rimshot.

我们有提过谢尔顿是个喜剧演员吗？他有各种笑话并且懂得在合适的时间抖包袱~

小提示：准备好接受他令人笑喷的冷笑话吧——一个中微子走进酒吧问喝杯酒多少钱？酒吧侍者回答：“对你，不要钱（不给你充电）。”

控制（你的笑）

对于这个梗也是有点无力啊，好像是说不充电的话，中微子就不正常？ no charge 取的是 “不要钱”和“没办给你充电”的双关？实在无法get笑点的话，回想一下谢耳朵讲了笑话之后他的表情吧……反正我看不懂的时候都是指着谢耳朵的表情笑。

13. He recognizes his faults, as well as his strengths.

Sheldon doesn't often make mistakes,but he’s not above admitting when he does. Pobody's nerfect, even if you havean IQ of 187, like Cooper.

谢尔顿不常犯错，因为错了他也不承认。Pobody'snerfect（一个拼写错误）——即使你是智商187的谢尔顿也不例外。

还记得那句“My brain is better than everybody”吗？被译成“朕的大脑天下无敌”，也是很服字幕组……

14. He’s persistent, which proves that he cares.

It's hard to enjoy a peaceful evening when Sheldon knocks on your front doorrepeatedly while shouting your name until you unlatch the lock; however, it'snice to know someone cares about you enough to wake up the entire apartmentcomplex in order to check on your well-being.

当谢尔顿在你家门前敲三次门，你不开门他就继续敲的时候，简直毁了一个安静的夜晚。但是，往好的方面想，居然有一个人关心你的健康而不在乎吵醒整个公寓的人哎！

治不好的强迫症……

15.He's there to help you celebrate your biggest milestones.

Not only did Sheldon raise a glass to toast Howard and Bernadette'spregnancy announcement, but his selfless side made arare appearance when he decided to open up a trust fund for babyWolowitz. 

当沃洛维茨夫妇宣布博纳黛拉怀孕的时候，谢尔顿不止举杯庆祝，他无私的一面也显露出来——给宝宝开信托基金！

有钱就是这么任性啊，土豪我们做朋友吧~

16. He's an excellent gift-giver.

Even if theonly reason Sheldon gave Amy a holiday gift last year was to make her feelguilty for notgettinghim one, we'd by lying if we said the whole convoluted present exchange wasn't sort ofsweet.

Besides, Amy was thrilled to have a framed photo of her beau, so the onusactually turned out to be awesome!

即使谢尔顿送艾米礼物的初衷是“让她因为没送我礼物而羞愧”，但是错综复杂的过程之后，结果是好的呀——艾米因为有了一张男朋友的照片而受宠若惊呢。

话说“为了让别人羞愧没送我礼物而羞愧，然后给别人买一个”这一招，小研用过……你们也可以试试……

17. He makes sure his friends feel included.

When you havea sizable friend group, it's hard to give everyone equal attention, but Sheldondoes his best to make all his pals feel special. For example, he could'vejoined the rest of the gang for a day of wine tasting, but instead, he stayed home with a pregnantBernadette toplay board games and drink sparkling apple cider.

If that doesn't exemplify an amazing friend, we don't know what does!

当你朋友很多的时候，很难给每个人同样的关注。

但是在平衡在朋友间的注意力这件事上，谢尔顿堪称完美。

比如，他和本可以和其他朋友花整一天去品酒，但是为了陪怀孕的博纳黛拉，他甘愿在家里喝起泡苹果酒并陪她玩儿棋盘游戏。

如果这都不算一个超级好朋友，那我们不知道还能是什么。

谢耳朵并不喜欢喝酒大家是知道的吧……他玩儿游戏的时候自己定规则大家也是知道的吧……真是辛苦博纳黛拉（哦，好像不小心剧透了第九季剧情呢）

18. He'd never let anyone take your spot in line.

Trying to seea summer blockbuster on opening weekend can be frustrating when you have to getto the theater early to stand in line. Plus, don't get us started when somebozo tries to cut! Luckily, Sheldon isn't the kind ofperson to let someone get away with that bad behavior,so go ahead and step out for some popcorn because your spot's safe withhim! 

周末去看一场夏季大片开幕式是不错，但是得早起去排队就不那么美妙了，而且还会有不守规矩的人试图冲出排队线导致开幕延迟。

对于这种行为，谢尔顿怎么能忍得了呢？所以，给谢尔顿带上些爆米花，你们一起去看开幕式吧，SheldonSpot 你懂得，他怎么可能让别人占了他的座儿~

不知道谢耳朵到时候会不会挨打，不过没事，他会跟人讲道理，然后别人会无奈而退却的……

19. He brings the best party platters.

If you're spending a night binge-watching your favorite flicks with Sheldon &Co., rest assured that you'll be well-fed, which is aces because the best wayto a friend's heart is through his—or her—belly!

如果你跟谢尔顿共度一晚——看自己最喜欢的电影，那么可以肯定你能吃得很饱，因为他会带很棒很多的零食，可能是因为他认为对朋友好最棒的方式就是喂饱他吧！

如果你是吃货，谢尔顿值得你拥有，你甚至免去了分别通知大家“还差麻酱”、“还差肉”才能凑一顿火锅的麻烦——谢尔顿自己就把东西都带全了……

20.He never enters a situation unprepared.

In addition to being on hand to supply snacks, Sheldon's also dependable for othernecessary—and not-so necessary—sundries, like bug spray, hand sanitizer, and asurvival. So, whether you're camping in a cabin or heading to the grocerystore, this guy's middle name is "Semper Paratus."

(Okay, Sheldon's real middle name is Lee, but you get the point.)

除了擅长准备零食，谢尔顿在供应其他有的没的杂物方面也是很靠谱的——如果你去露营，需要杀虫剂、洗手液等东西的时候，谢尔顿的中间名就是“随时候命”。（好吧，其实谢尔顿的中间名是Lee,不过，你懂得）

谢耳朵在手，想要什么都不愁……